Deinfluencing

Busting social media's French myths

Here’s what I’ve learned about life in France from social media influencers:

• French people don’t talk to strangers. There is no French small talk.

• Don’t ask a French person what they do for a living. It’s too personal. 

• Don’t ever wear leggings or athleisure wear in France unless you are inside the gym, then get changed in the locker room immediately after you finish your workout so you can walk home in non-athletic clothes and shoes, as if it never even happened.

• While you are walking home, don’t dare smile because French people don’t smile. 

• In order to blend in with the French, and especially with Parisians, you need to get all dressed up. All the time.

• The French never–ever wear flip-flops or baseball caps or sweatpants or Uggs. 

• They don’t ever talk loud and Americans are by far the loudest of all talkers.

• They also don’t eat or drink while walking on the street. 

• All their meals are at home or in a restaurant where they can linger and savor every bite, not walking around chewing like a savage. 

• The French also wouldn’t dream of drinking from water bottles–especially big water bottles. Ew! 

That list up there? All wrong. Some of it is wrong because, while once kind of right, it’s now completely outdated. Most are flawed because they are fairy tales, probably created by young American TikTokers who came here on vacation once or twice and want to keep puffing up the French mystique. Maybe they gained a few followers among the wannabe Emilys in Paris, or maybe even scored a sponsorship with a fancy suitcase company. 

Consequently, there are now hundreds of flustered Americans asking panicked questions in Facebook travel groups about what kind of shoes and hats are acceptable to wear in France. 

Let’s blow the dust off that mystique, shall we?

I talk to French strangers all the time. Those strangers talk back. No drama, no weird looks or uncomfortable silences. Just two normal people talking to each other about nothing much at all. Maybe a word about the weather or how late the bus is. You know, small talk.

French people have actually volunteered to talk to me about their work. When I’ve inquired, they’ve answered without appearing stricken or insulted.

Women wear leggings here. I wear leggings here. Leggings are not forbidden. French people even walk to and from the gym in their workout clothes. Hell, just a couple blocks from me there’s a whole group of men who work out on outdoor equipment without their shirts on. Even when it’s cold out. 

When it comes to smiling I need to make a crucial distinction. The French don’t walk around smiling at nothing, like a lot of golly-gee Americans. But they do, indeed, smile. Often. If you see something amusing on the street and you catch the eye of the French person who also saw it, they will, indeed, smile at you. A big old smile. Maybe even a laugh or – gasp! – a bit of small talk. 

Seen many times on the French people of Rennes, and even Paris: Sweatpants. Baseball caps. Leggings! Flip flops. Jeans. Sneakers. Uggs. Crop Tops. Short-shorts. And T-shirts with weird made-up American college names. Harlem All-American College?

Flip flops and Birkenstocks displayed outside the Via Spiga store in Rennes.

Ohmygod, they eat while walking. Where did this even come from? Gallette-wrapped sausages were made for walking and eating. So were pastries and sandwich rolls and ice cream cones. Romanticizing everyday French eating habits just because they make some of the best food in the world is ludicrous. They also flock to McDonald’s and Starbucks and Pizza Hut. Sometimes they are hungry and need to get somewhere real quick, so they do those two things at once. One thing I will say about their eating habits: I’ve never seen a French person stinking up a bus or Metro car with their greasy fries, so there’s that. 

To refute the never-use-a-flask statute, here’s a picture worth a thousand water bottles:

A huge water bottle display at one of our local kitchen stores.

Not only do stores stock plenty of water bottles, but providing easy access to refill your gourde has inspired a website to locate fountains and refill stations.

Finally, to those who insist that the French speak in a dignified whisper, please come to my apartment between the hours of midnight and 6 a.m. to listen to the French people outside talking loud enough to wake the dead. Yes, Americans may be louder than the French in a restaurant, but outside after a night of drinking? Move aside, obnoxious Americans.

Also, Americans do not hold the title of the World’s Loudest Talkers. That belongs to the Italians.